CAESURA! (punk variation)
by LEMONWORTH SAINTS
CAESURA!
CAESURA!
CAESURA!
CAESURA!
CAESURA!
CAESURA!
SHE'S OUR-A
SHE'S MINE-A
SHE'S YOUR-A
CAESURA
CAESURA
CAESURA
she's always blah blah blah
i'm always like yeah yeah yeah
this is just a lost cause
i need a tasteful pause
(pause for 1 minute)
CAESURA!
Monday, February 23, 2009
Destroyer by Lemonworth Saints
DESTROYER
by THE LEMONWORTH SAINTS
Verse I
Head in the sand
feet in the snow
how can i lose?
I'm thinking of sex
I'm thinking of food
but i'm always thinkin of you
Verse II
Tense and release
your truth doesnt cease
i'm swimming in my socks
can't get the feel
eating oatmeal
i'm living inside the box
Verse III
i'm living my life
no need for a wife
cause i could really care less
so what if you sneer
i'll still be here
i will not coalesce
Chorus
Destroyer! (destroyer)
Destroyer! (destroyer)
Destroyer! (destroyer)
Destroyer of dreams! (destroyer)
X2
by THE LEMONWORTH SAINTS
Verse I
Head in the sand
feet in the snow
how can i lose?
I'm thinking of sex
I'm thinking of food
but i'm always thinkin of you
Verse II
Tense and release
your truth doesnt cease
i'm swimming in my socks
can't get the feel
eating oatmeal
i'm living inside the box
Verse III
i'm living my life
no need for a wife
cause i could really care less
so what if you sneer
i'll still be here
i will not coalesce
Chorus
Destroyer! (destroyer)
Destroyer! (destroyer)
Destroyer! (destroyer)
Destroyer of dreams! (destroyer)
X2
ITS PUNK WEEK!
hello anyone who is reading
i may not know you but im sure that you are reading at this point and are riveted. well its punk week this week due to the up-coming DROPKICK MURPHYS concert on SUNDAY MARCH 1ST in which me, scotty boy, sheldon peterson, and derek lund will be in attendance. I'm not sure how much of a punker you are but to let you know its punk week which means mohawks, suspenders, ties, skinny-ass jeans, faux-sunglasses, fauw-hawks, chuck taylors, and ripped t-shirts will be thrown in the mix so expect something special this whole week coming from my wardrobe. thanks for reading and keep watching you never know who you will meet.
have a nice day
tony malone
i may not know you but im sure that you are reading at this point and are riveted. well its punk week this week due to the up-coming DROPKICK MURPHYS concert on SUNDAY MARCH 1ST in which me, scotty boy, sheldon peterson, and derek lund will be in attendance. I'm not sure how much of a punker you are but to let you know its punk week which means mohawks, suspenders, ties, skinny-ass jeans, faux-sunglasses, fauw-hawks, chuck taylors, and ripped t-shirts will be thrown in the mix so expect something special this whole week coming from my wardrobe. thanks for reading and keep watching you never know who you will meet.
have a nice day
tony malone
The Spotlight
The Spotlight
By Tony Brunelle
Is she done yet?
Jenny Whatsername
jenny please we have all heard Chops
played so childishly on piano
let the big boys have a chance
Finally she is done
so I move frantically
as I am escorted by my instructer of sorts
and now It is my time In the sun
or at least the hot heat lamp in this dank church hall
Its my turn
to show the congregation
How
I
Break
It
Down
Not one not missed
not one chord askew
pretty damn goodfor an 8 year old
Applause!
as I lean over to the mic
that is on my guitar and say
“thank you, thank you very much”
By Tony Brunelle
Is she done yet?
Jenny Whatsername
jenny please we have all heard Chops
played so childishly on piano
let the big boys have a chance
Finally she is done
so I move frantically
as I am escorted by my instructer of sorts
and now It is my time In the sun
or at least the hot heat lamp in this dank church hall
Its my turn
to show the congregation
How
I
Break
It
Down
Not one not missed
not one chord askew
pretty damn goodfor an 8 year old
Applause!
as I lean over to the mic
that is on my guitar and say
“thank you, thank you very much”
Tuesday, February 17, 2009
The Amazing Anoka Police (Based on a True Story)
THE AMAZING ANOKA POLICE
(BASED ON A TRUE STORY)
By Tony Brunelle
TONY, SETH, CODY, OFFICER LENARD, OFFICER LOYDD, NARRATOR.
[Scene opens with Cody, Seth, and Tony on the upper part of the stage looking bored and kicking a bottle on the ground to each other. Narrator is stage right.]
NARRATOR
It was a bright afternoon around 5 o’clock in Anoka Minnesota while three boys decide to kill time and loiter around the top of a nearby parking ramp after visiting a local jazz concert. This is their story.
TONY
So I don’t see a reason why we are on this parking ramp
SETH
Well I’ts Anoka. There is only old people, old buildings and a jazz festival, which was SUPPOSED to be a rock n roll concert.
[SETH and TONY look at CODY with conviction]
CODY
So I misinterpreted the flyer. BIG DEAL! So sue me.
TONY
Did you misunderstand the part about the craft sale as well?
SETH
Yeah what a waste of time oh well at least we can get home in an hour.
TONY
Dude I am bored out of my mind
SETH
You’re telling me man.
CODY
Fellas fellas we can have all the fun we want. TONY CATCH!!!
[CODY throws the bottle towards TONY and it goes over the edge]
[TONY and SETH look at each other and laugh]
TONY
Well Cody you sure know how to spice up an evening
SETH
Yeah you sure are a crazy guy. I wish I partied with you more often [laughs]
[Alarm on parking ramp sounds]
TONY
What is going on? Did one of you guys touch a Mercedes?
SETH
I don’t know man but I don’t wanna find out im running for it
[SETH and TONY run stage right for the elevator station and push the elevator down button frantically while CODY stays there and looks over the edge for the bottle]
TONY
[speaking frantically] DUDE THE ELEVATOR IS TAKING FOREVER
SETH
Dude our only chance is to walk down the stairs casually we didn’t do anything wrong. It was Cody anyway
TONY
Alright I’m with you
[TONY and SETH start to walk down the stairs casually, meanwhile OFFICER LENARD and OFFICER LOYDD enter from stage right running as fast as they can]
[meanwhile CODY catches the elevator doors opening and gets in]
OFFICER LENARD
[speaking with extreme authority] STOP, YOU PUNKS!!!
[OFFICER LOYDD standing by OFFICER LENARD extremely out of breath]
TONY
Sir, I believe you have the wrong [interupted by OFFICER LENARD]
OFFICER LENARD
Save it for the judge, you little sneak, we don’t just let rapstalions like you two get away with littering to the 2nd degree.
SETH
Officer you don’t under [interupted by OFFICER LENARD]
OFFICER LENARD
Oh no you don’t, don’t try to lie to me Al Capone. You can either take the easy route and admit right now or you can just have a harder time getting out of juvenile court
SETH
[very surprised] J-J-J-JUVENILE COURT?
TONY
Officers, you have the wrong idea
[OFFICER LOYDD starts to catch his breath]
OFFICER LOYDD
[breath] We saw you two [breath] up there [breath] causing mischeif
OFFICER LENARD
[laughs] You thought you were gonna get away with it too. Well gentlemen I guess the mastermind teenagers are no match for the Anoka police. You better just admit to it right now.
TONY
Officer I swear that we didn’t do anything wrong we don’t even know what you’re talking about.
SETH
[said in panic] IT WAS US WE DID IT
TONY
[TONY looks at seth in surprise]
Seth? What the hell man?
SETH
Dude I can’t do time. It’s terrible in there.
[OFFICER LENARD begins to hand-cuff TONY and SETH]
OFFICER LOYDD
You two thought you were so smart
[laughs and gives a triumphant high five to OFFICER LENARD]
OFFICER LOYDD
I’ gonna go pull the car around
OFFICER LENARD
Yeah we got you this time
TONY
[speaking with anger]
LISTEN WE DIDN’T THROW THE BOTTLE IT WAS [interupted by SETH]
SETH
Tony don’t be a rat
TONY
No dude I’ not going to juvi for that kid.
SETH
Dude I don’t think you should
TONY
[speaking with anger once again]
Are you kidding me? Do you really wanna go to juvi for that? I mean its CODY man the kid who brought us here today, CODY is the culprit. Also I can’t risk another disappointment to my parents.
SETH
What do you mean?
TONY
I sort of dropped my sister off at the ice arena and forgot to pick her up.
SETH
So?
TONY
I was supposed to drop her off at volleyball practice.
OFFICER LENARD
You two quiet down. Anything you say can be recorded against you in a court.
TONY
Don’t you mean anything you say or do can and will be held against you in a court of law?
OFFICER LENARD
Don’t back-sass me boy. It’s not helping your chances. That mouth of yours is gonna get you in a lot of trouble.
TONY
But all I said was [interupted by OFFICER LENARD]
OFFICER LENARD
Ah ah ah your best bet is to keep your mouth shut on this one sonny.
TONY
Officer you’re not listening we didn’t do it.
OFFICER LENARD
Oh no I not falling for that you already admitted to doing the crime so now you gotta do the time
SETH
Well it really wasn’t our fault
TONY
Yeah you gotta believe us
OFFICER LENARD
Oh yeah well where is the criminal then did he fly away
TONY
To be honest with you I don’t know
[CODY exits elevator to bottom left stage and walks right by OFFICER LENARD]
CODY
Good evening officer.
OFFICER LENARD
Oh good evening young man
TONY
[exitedly]
THAT’S HIM THAT’S THE CRIMINAL
OFFICER LENARD
[laughs] Like im gonna fall for that one. You got to get up pretty early in the morning to fool the likes of the Anoka police force.
TONY
No seriously officer
SETH
That’s the guy. Honest.
OFFICER LENARD
You two are some of the worst liars I have ever met
[OFFICER LOYDD returns without the police car]
OFFICER LOYDD
Officer Lenard I cant get the car to start some hooligans syphoned our gas
OFFICER LENARD
Good grief what is the world coming too?
[OFFICER LENARD starts to repremand OFFICER LOYDD about how OFFICER LOYDD forgot to fill the tank before duty]
[TONY and SETH start to plot]
[TONY and SETH whispering]
TONY
Alright we’ll create a distraction.
SETH
Alright I’m down.
TONY
So you start yelling and screaming and saying that you have asthma and that you cant go on without your inhaler which conveniently is located in your back pocket and you need Officer Lenard to grab it for you
SETH
Ok
TONY
So then after he does that you kick him in the leg and I’ll grab his tazor at which point I will sub-due Officer Loydd. At that point you start to kick Officer Lenard. Then I’ll make my escape.
SETH
And . . . . ?
TONY
And what?
SETH
And how do I escape?
TONY
[realization] OH. Your escaping too? I thought we agreed I have more to live for?
SETH
[angrily] Oh jeez.
TONY
Ok ok ok new plan.
[pause]
TONY
Is there a possibilty of us digging our way out of this?
SETH
AWW JEEZ!! I’m being arrested with an idiot
TONY
Well I don’t see you coming up with any good ideas
SETH
Ok how about this. We create a distraction and say there are some kids robbing a bank down there see?
TONY
Gotcha
SETH
At that point we will run as fast as we can in the opposite direction.
TONY
I don’t see the exit strategy in that but I’ll go along seeing as there are no other alternatives
[OFFICER LOYDD and OFFICER LENARD realize them whispering]
OFFICER LOYDD
Hey hey hey this isnt a high school reunion now break it up you two..
SETH
Uh sorry officer we just couldn’t help but notice those kids robbing that bank
[OFFICER LENARD and OFFICER LOYDD both look the other way]
OFFICER LOYDD
[frantically] WHAT? WHERE?
[SETH and TONY run stage left while seconds later OFFICER LOYDD and OFFICER LENARD try to catch them]
NARRATORThe two boys ran and ran and ran all the way down main street only to discover they were running directly towards the Anoka County Courthouse where they encountered the Police station as well. Seth however gave them the slip by jumping in a nearby dumpster while Tony was caught and put into a cruiser and sent to Lino Lakes Detention center and was sentenced to 2 years in Juvenile Hall for 1 count of littering from a high area. No one knows what happened to Seth but it seems he was never caught nor convicted.
(BASED ON A TRUE STORY)
By Tony Brunelle
TONY, SETH, CODY, OFFICER LENARD, OFFICER LOYDD, NARRATOR.
[Scene opens with Cody, Seth, and Tony on the upper part of the stage looking bored and kicking a bottle on the ground to each other. Narrator is stage right.]
NARRATOR
It was a bright afternoon around 5 o’clock in Anoka Minnesota while three boys decide to kill time and loiter around the top of a nearby parking ramp after visiting a local jazz concert. This is their story.
TONY
So I don’t see a reason why we are on this parking ramp
SETH
Well I’ts Anoka. There is only old people, old buildings and a jazz festival, which was SUPPOSED to be a rock n roll concert.
[SETH and TONY look at CODY with conviction]
CODY
So I misinterpreted the flyer. BIG DEAL! So sue me.
TONY
Did you misunderstand the part about the craft sale as well?
SETH
Yeah what a waste of time oh well at least we can get home in an hour.
TONY
Dude I am bored out of my mind
SETH
You’re telling me man.
CODY
Fellas fellas we can have all the fun we want. TONY CATCH!!!
[CODY throws the bottle towards TONY and it goes over the edge]
[TONY and SETH look at each other and laugh]
TONY
Well Cody you sure know how to spice up an evening
SETH
Yeah you sure are a crazy guy. I wish I partied with you more often [laughs]
[Alarm on parking ramp sounds]
TONY
What is going on? Did one of you guys touch a Mercedes?
SETH
I don’t know man but I don’t wanna find out im running for it
[SETH and TONY run stage right for the elevator station and push the elevator down button frantically while CODY stays there and looks over the edge for the bottle]
TONY
[speaking frantically] DUDE THE ELEVATOR IS TAKING FOREVER
SETH
Dude our only chance is to walk down the stairs casually we didn’t do anything wrong. It was Cody anyway
TONY
Alright I’m with you
[TONY and SETH start to walk down the stairs casually, meanwhile OFFICER LENARD and OFFICER LOYDD enter from stage right running as fast as they can]
[meanwhile CODY catches the elevator doors opening and gets in]
OFFICER LENARD
[speaking with extreme authority] STOP, YOU PUNKS!!!
[OFFICER LOYDD standing by OFFICER LENARD extremely out of breath]
TONY
Sir, I believe you have the wrong [interupted by OFFICER LENARD]
OFFICER LENARD
Save it for the judge, you little sneak, we don’t just let rapstalions like you two get away with littering to the 2nd degree.
SETH
Officer you don’t under [interupted by OFFICER LENARD]
OFFICER LENARD
Oh no you don’t, don’t try to lie to me Al Capone. You can either take the easy route and admit right now or you can just have a harder time getting out of juvenile court
SETH
[very surprised] J-J-J-JUVENILE COURT?
TONY
Officers, you have the wrong idea
[OFFICER LOYDD starts to catch his breath]
OFFICER LOYDD
[breath] We saw you two [breath] up there [breath] causing mischeif
OFFICER LENARD
[laughs] You thought you were gonna get away with it too. Well gentlemen I guess the mastermind teenagers are no match for the Anoka police. You better just admit to it right now.
TONY
Officer I swear that we didn’t do anything wrong we don’t even know what you’re talking about.
SETH
[said in panic] IT WAS US WE DID IT
TONY
[TONY looks at seth in surprise]
Seth? What the hell man?
SETH
Dude I can’t do time. It’s terrible in there.
[OFFICER LENARD begins to hand-cuff TONY and SETH]
OFFICER LOYDD
You two thought you were so smart
[laughs and gives a triumphant high five to OFFICER LENARD]
OFFICER LOYDD
I’ gonna go pull the car around
OFFICER LENARD
Yeah we got you this time
TONY
[speaking with anger]
LISTEN WE DIDN’T THROW THE BOTTLE IT WAS [interupted by SETH]
SETH
Tony don’t be a rat
TONY
No dude I’ not going to juvi for that kid.
SETH
Dude I don’t think you should
TONY
[speaking with anger once again]
Are you kidding me? Do you really wanna go to juvi for that? I mean its CODY man the kid who brought us here today, CODY is the culprit. Also I can’t risk another disappointment to my parents.
SETH
What do you mean?
TONY
I sort of dropped my sister off at the ice arena and forgot to pick her up.
SETH
So?
TONY
I was supposed to drop her off at volleyball practice.
OFFICER LENARD
You two quiet down. Anything you say can be recorded against you in a court.
TONY
Don’t you mean anything you say or do can and will be held against you in a court of law?
OFFICER LENARD
Don’t back-sass me boy. It’s not helping your chances. That mouth of yours is gonna get you in a lot of trouble.
TONY
But all I said was [interupted by OFFICER LENARD]
OFFICER LENARD
Ah ah ah your best bet is to keep your mouth shut on this one sonny.
TONY
Officer you’re not listening we didn’t do it.
OFFICER LENARD
Oh no I not falling for that you already admitted to doing the crime so now you gotta do the time
SETH
Well it really wasn’t our fault
TONY
Yeah you gotta believe us
OFFICER LENARD
Oh yeah well where is the criminal then did he fly away
TONY
To be honest with you I don’t know
[CODY exits elevator to bottom left stage and walks right by OFFICER LENARD]
CODY
Good evening officer.
OFFICER LENARD
Oh good evening young man
TONY
[exitedly]
THAT’S HIM THAT’S THE CRIMINAL
OFFICER LENARD
[laughs] Like im gonna fall for that one. You got to get up pretty early in the morning to fool the likes of the Anoka police force.
TONY
No seriously officer
SETH
That’s the guy. Honest.
OFFICER LENARD
You two are some of the worst liars I have ever met
[OFFICER LOYDD returns without the police car]
OFFICER LOYDD
Officer Lenard I cant get the car to start some hooligans syphoned our gas
OFFICER LENARD
Good grief what is the world coming too?
[OFFICER LENARD starts to repremand OFFICER LOYDD about how OFFICER LOYDD forgot to fill the tank before duty]
[TONY and SETH start to plot]
[TONY and SETH whispering]
TONY
Alright we’ll create a distraction.
SETH
Alright I’m down.
TONY
So you start yelling and screaming and saying that you have asthma and that you cant go on without your inhaler which conveniently is located in your back pocket and you need Officer Lenard to grab it for you
SETH
Ok
TONY
So then after he does that you kick him in the leg and I’ll grab his tazor at which point I will sub-due Officer Loydd. At that point you start to kick Officer Lenard. Then I’ll make my escape.
SETH
And . . . . ?
TONY
And what?
SETH
And how do I escape?
TONY
[realization] OH. Your escaping too? I thought we agreed I have more to live for?
SETH
[angrily] Oh jeez.
TONY
Ok ok ok new plan.
[pause]
TONY
Is there a possibilty of us digging our way out of this?
SETH
AWW JEEZ!! I’m being arrested with an idiot
TONY
Well I don’t see you coming up with any good ideas
SETH
Ok how about this. We create a distraction and say there are some kids robbing a bank down there see?
TONY
Gotcha
SETH
At that point we will run as fast as we can in the opposite direction.
TONY
I don’t see the exit strategy in that but I’ll go along seeing as there are no other alternatives
[OFFICER LOYDD and OFFICER LENARD realize them whispering]
OFFICER LOYDD
Hey hey hey this isnt a high school reunion now break it up you two..
SETH
Uh sorry officer we just couldn’t help but notice those kids robbing that bank
[OFFICER LENARD and OFFICER LOYDD both look the other way]
OFFICER LOYDD
[frantically] WHAT? WHERE?
[SETH and TONY run stage left while seconds later OFFICER LOYDD and OFFICER LENARD try to catch them]
NARRATORThe two boys ran and ran and ran all the way down main street only to discover they were running directly towards the Anoka County Courthouse where they encountered the Police station as well. Seth however gave them the slip by jumping in a nearby dumpster while Tony was caught and put into a cruiser and sent to Lino Lakes Detention center and was sentenced to 2 years in Juvenile Hall for 1 count of littering from a high area. No one knows what happened to Seth but it seems he was never caught nor convicted.
Monday, February 9, 2009
The Bruise (Variation of The Brews) by Lemonworth Saints
Verse I
Friday night we'll
be drinking full throttle
going out to hit luke with the door
being loud and trying to find the chicks
as long as we're home by the state mandated curfew
Chorus I
CAUSE HEY!
I gave luke a bruise
puking blood all over the ground and shoes
oi oi
we're the boys
the unorthodoxic acidic city boys
Verse II
Orthopedic, DC's last me
longer than they should with the things i do
reputation, lost through illiteration
christianity no longer my religion
Chorus II
CAUSE HEY!
we gave luke a bruise
sporting a face of black and blue
oi oi
we're the boys
the minne suburb bored as hell cheap dudes
Bridge
we've got the mic
psycho barracuda's
we cant the lose the fight
cause we left the chosen ones
tony driven
we've battled and we feast
we celebrate and separate
the race from the real thing
Chorus x2
oi oi
luke has a bruise
spitting blood onto the ground and shoes
oi oi
we're the boys
the champlin suburn bored as hell cheap dudes
Friday night we'll
be drinking full throttle
going out to hit luke with the door
being loud and trying to find the chicks
as long as we're home by the state mandated curfew
Chorus I
CAUSE HEY!
I gave luke a bruise
puking blood all over the ground and shoes
oi oi
we're the boys
the unorthodoxic acidic city boys
Verse II
Orthopedic, DC's last me
longer than they should with the things i do
reputation, lost through illiteration
christianity no longer my religion
Chorus II
CAUSE HEY!
we gave luke a bruise
sporting a face of black and blue
oi oi
we're the boys
the minne suburb bored as hell cheap dudes
Bridge
we've got the mic
psycho barracuda's
we cant the lose the fight
cause we left the chosen ones
tony driven
we've battled and we feast
we celebrate and separate
the race from the real thing
Chorus x2
oi oi
luke has a bruise
spitting blood onto the ground and shoes
oi oi
we're the boys
the champlin suburn bored as hell cheap dudes
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